1. |
Hot Buttons
00:18
|
|||
|
Hi everyone! I'm a bagel! With cream cheese! And I made this album all by myself!
(hot, hot buttons)
|
||||
2. |
Six-Track Leader
05:00
|
|||
|
Hickory:
I am a six track leader
Sports Illustrated swimsuit reader
I created six babies in the first year of my school life
When I go to church, they ask “where’s your wife”
Some like it hot and some like it not
Turn this track up a little more, baby
Some like it hot and some like it not
Turn this track up a little more, baby
Now the train is rolling down the track like it owns the station
I am like a human crustacean
One afternoon I took a walk just six feet from the park
I am not allowed to go in because I am a shark
Some like it hot and some like it not
Turn this track up a little more, baby
Some like it hot and some like it not
Turn this track up a little more, baby
In Salt Lake City, I covered the windows (pronounce “winders”)
And then I returned my six babies to sender
Where they are now, I’ll never know
I should have left them with Grandpa Joe
Some like it hot and some like it not
Turn this track up a little more, baby
Some like it hot and some like it not
Turn this track up a little more, baby
Ezra (screaming): SIX TRACK LEADER! STOP IT WITH YOUR BEATER! I’M TRYING TO WATCH BLUE PETER! MY URINAL HOLDS FIVE LETTERS!
Carson (through marimba):
Garth Brooks tastes like garlic naan.
My intestines live in an Ikea futon.
This is for you, Mom.
I will try to play tom-toms.
(tom-toms)
Aurelia:
Where did you go, six track leader?
Attend to your six track label, if you are able
My six track mind is one track only
The six track leader left me lonely
Aurelia, Hickory:
Inside we have donkey lunch book heart
Inside we have donkey lunch book heart
Inside we have donkey lunch book heart
Inside we have donkey lunch book heart
(both repeat, over):
Ezra:
(SIX TRACK LEADER!)
(PARKING METER!)
(CORN DOG EATER!)
(SIX TRACK WEINER!)
Carson:
Six track leader.
Did you go to the dry cleaner’s?
My favorite athlete, Derek Jeter.
Mitch McConnell is the Senate minority leader.
(choir)
|
||||
3. |
Rain In My Taxi
03:19
|
|||
|
On a Sunday evening;
A melancholy drive in NYC
As I watch, it's raining everywhere in my taxi
I can't believe that God has just decided to allow it to rain indoors
It smells of a wet dog all over the floor
But come to think of it, I appreciate the white noise ambience
Even if it only lasts in transience
I am:
Bathing in ethereal bliss
Bathing in ethereal bliss
Bathing in ethereal bliss
Bathing in ethereal bliss
Even if the rain may feel like a soaking cold kiss
I'm being showered in every orifice
Feels like there should be a soundtrack for this
Beauty & softness
A nice lullaby, this is
I am:
Bathing in ethereal bliss
Bathing in ethereal bliss
Bathing in ethereal bliss
Bathing in ethereal bliss
Feels like I am relaxed, floating downstream
But please don't be long, Mr. Taxi Driver
Or I may be asleep
(Talking): "Oh boy, those drugs really did do me well
I feel like a million bucks":
Relaxing and floating downstream
I'm bathing in ethereal bliss
Relaxing and floating downstream
I'm bathing in ethereal bliss
Relaxing and floating downstream
I'm bathing in ethereal bliss
Relaxing and floating downstream
I'm bathing in ethereal bliss
And now I'm asleep
|
||||
4. |
||||
5. |
Drummer That Hurts
02:38
|
|||
6. |
||||
7. |
Get Out and Go Somewhere
03:19
|
|||
|
Twas eating a ham sandwich in Mauritius
Or maybe I was dancing the hula dance in Jamaica
Man, you should have seen her
She was Jamaican me crazy
Possibly I was somersaulting down a hill in Iceland
But my point is this, dear son:
Oh, boy you should get out
You should get out of your garage and go somewhere
Travel anywhere, anyhow
I don't care
Be it a submarine, a car, or your own two feet
Any adventure, any place
Just get out and go somewhere
Just get out and go somewhere
Just get out and go somewhere
Oh, I was going bounty hunting in Switzerland
Or maybe I was catching a dogfish in Lima, Peru
Or perhaps I was swimming on up to the Eiffel Tower
And then I was mourning in the ethereal Saint Lucian sunlight
Oh, boy you should get out
You should get out of your garage and go somewhere
Travel anywhere, anyhow
I don't care
Be it a submarine, a car, or your own two feet
Any adventure, any place
Just get out and go somewhere
Just get out and go somewhere
Just get out and go somewhere
Because the only trip you can take
To experience these things with me
Which I think we can agree
Is completely free
Now say it with me
1, 2, 3:
LSD, LSD, LSD
|
||||
8. |
||||
9. |
||||
10. |
||||
11. |
||||
|
Hello, pleased to meet you
I'm a 50-year-old DJ spinning turntables
I currently live in the sewers
I never made it past high school
I'm been trying to afford a meal this week
So I can start my investment in cryptocurrency
And then start my illegal narcotics company
Maybe even publish my new LP
It's filled with prayers to President FDR
Maybe his New Deal public works
Will help me afford my dream to drive at NASCAR
My son wants to go to the museum
Where you can see SpongeBob's head in a jar
And smoke a moonshine cigar
The semen is subpar
Adolf Hitler should be run over by a railcar
John Lennon can play the sitar
Aw, play that guitar
Just so you know, I'm only working minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Everybody say UBI, UBI!
It's tomorrow morning, and I'm spinning Sgt. Pepper's on the turntables
Sometimes I never know
Whether or not I'll starve that day
President Roosevelt says "the only thing we have to fear is fear itself" but I don't know if I can sympathize when I can barely pay the rent
Nobody seems to pay me a tip
Let alone a wage
I tell ya, some people are only in it for the money
How infuriating, capitalism is
But I'm only working minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Everybody say free healthcare, free healthcare!
"What's that? You say I forgot to mention my son? It must be the drugs I'm taking"!
It's the next day
Now did I mention it's midterms
I can't decide whether to vote for Jimmy Carl Black or Alf Landon after FDR, for ranked choice voting
"Screw it", I say, as I head to the McDonald's instead
The food is so darn cheap that I'm sure at the very least I can afford bread
“I wonder if McDonald's takes food stamps”, I say to myself
Now I'm pulling up in my Tesla in the drive-thru window
When I spot FDR
Or maybe it's Chester Arthur
"Did you order the jumbo-sized fries with a side of cocaine and capitalism"? says whichever president it is
But before I'm able to answer, what sounds like an alternate universe plays right before me. This is what it sounded like:
I jump into a portal, and I am no longer poor
Every beggar should do this
I am now a millionaire
I was working minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Only minimum wage
Yes, but not any more!
Everybody say flat tax rate, flat tax rate!
|
||||
12. |
||||
13. |
Mona
02:39
|
|||
|
Don't puke in the bathwater!
|
||||
14. |
||||
15. |
Eat The Rich
01:20
|
|||
16. |
||||
|
I'm a bear, I'm a bear, I'm a one-armed pink bear
And I'm trying to make my way in the world
I'm a bear, I'm a bear, I'm a one-armed pink bear
And I'm trying to make my way in the world
I'm a bear, I'm a bear, I'm a one-armed pink bear
And I'm driving around in a truck
I'm a bear, I'm a bear, I'm a one-armed pink bear
I have to clean off the windshield muck
And then I have to eat berries and eventually hibernate
|
||||
17. |
Eat The Poor
00:55
|
|||
18. |
Parting Gong
01:56
|
|||
19. |
||||
|
Humans used to keep dinosaurs in their cages
But they broke out on the ranges
You know from elementary school that penguins evolved from dinosaurs
But you may wonder what they have tin pantries for
They have managed to develop basic food storage
I should probably start singing the chorus
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
This song is supposed to be some kind of metaphor
That happens to also rhyme with dinosaur
It's about getting out of your shitty living situation
And developing better ways to store food or something
I think this message no longer needs dilution
I don't really understand evolution
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Imagine all the penguins living life in tin pantries
Imagine all the dinosaurs roaming freely
Imagine them eating you and me
Imagine their tiny arms not being able to reach
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
Traveling from the dinosaur cage to the penguin tin pantry
|
||||
20. |
Touché
03:31
|
|||
|
Battle of wits, battle of wills
Battle of pitfalls, battle of pills
Pitfalls of power, what color rulers do
And who'd ever like
Somebody like you
Filth and shadows, jeweler's gold
I wanna be like you when I get old
I wanna walk the walk and talk the talk
I wanna live under a pretty rock
Pedantic, proud, and sometimes snappy
Say the words that make me happy
Make a list, a closing fist
Of things to say and people to kiss
Pick a side, pick a side
Fearful silence or foolish pride
I have better knowledge for a song
But disaster strikes should I be wrong
And not belong
Filth and shadows, jeweler's gold
I wanna think like you when I get old
I wanna walk the walk and talk the talk
I wanna live over a pretty frock
Making references that spread confusion
What's the cost of my allusion
What's the worst that they could do
"They," somehowe including you
Quoting battles, don't you like
Why I say it gets me every time
Doesn't knightly cruelty distract affectations
Don't you know what it is I'm saying
Filth and shadows, jeweler's gold
I wanna be like you when I get old
I wanna walk the walk and talk the talk
I wanna live under a pretty rock
Battle of wits, battle of wills
It's a battle of pitfalls, a battle of pills
Pitfalls of power, what color rulers do
And who'd ever like
Someone who likes you
|
||||
Fake Members Records Portland, Oregon
Founded in 1888.
Beyond The Opposite of Stupid
Born Inambooite
www.youtube.com/@fakemembersrecords8949
Fake Members Records recommends:
Nonagon Infinity
by King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard
rock+reel, fishies! endless looping insane sci-fi tales from down under - john spiderman
go to album
Blurring the lines between sarcasm and reality, between sadist love songs like Bill Watterson and comedy bits like Knife Fight. Wonderful - R. Mutt
go to album
Sung Tongs
by Animal Collective
so mellowdramatic and fun, this is folk music for the 55th century - Alice Coltrane For President
go to albumIf you like Four Beers On The Moon, you may also like:
Bodhi Cheetah's Choice
by Prana Crafter
Prana Crafter’s “Bodhi Cheetah’s Choice” is an album of mystic, drifting guitar work alternately haunting and searing.
go to album
Every Bird Ever [Album]
by Ilithios
The new record from Brooklyn indie group Ilithios is full of big-hearted songs with the hooks to match.
go to album
Meeting of the Dons
by Donny Love
Aussie cosmonauts teleport their art rock to the dancefloor, expanding their spaced-out sound with elements of disco and synthpop.
go to album
